What We Really Want For Valentines’ Day

By Juli and Jac

As much as I love the butterfly my daughter made for me out of toilet paper rolls and construction paper, there are some things Jac and I would perhaps prefer to receive for Valentine’s Day from our children. Here are 10 examples of these, in no particular order. Here’s hoping our kids read this and can deliver on at LEAST one of these before V-day is over. We are not holding our breath.

  1. One hour of complete and blissful silence, while they play happily in their room. And for one child in particular to get OFF of his sister.
  2. A couple of giant chocolate Reese peanut butter hearts that say: “Thanks for giving birth to me!” Or, “Thanks for cleaning up that play-doh I ground into the rug the other day,” or, “Thanks for wiping my bum EVEN WHEN I KNOW HOW TO DO IT MYSELF.” For these, you see, are signs of true love and deserve some sweet chocolate peanut-buttery thanks in return.
  3. A dinner out where strangers will feel compelled to come up to us and compliment us on how lovely and well-behaved our children are being.
  4. For our kids to stop pooping in their undies.
  5. A room that stays clean for more than 5 minutes.
  6. An afternoon of lovely, cuddly, family togetherness time, with no fights or complaints happening. Also, I’m serious, get OFF of your sister.
  7. For my kids to be able to handle their own cards for their class, all by themselves.
  8. A break from all the “mommy” “mommy” “mommy” requests.
  9. A thoughtful and special and expensive gift, without having to give one, and somehow to not feel at all guilty for this.
  10. GET OFF OF YOUR SISTER.

Happy Valentine’s, friends! We hope you are also shown love today, whether or not you have someone to share it with, in ways that involve rest and coffee and no guilt and peace and hugs. Also diamonds. 

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