For me, this Spring Break has been … difficult. Now that my work is very full-time and my husband’s work is also full-time, and my children are both in school, I have become accustomed to the amount of time I have to do my work either after I drop my kids at school, or before I pick them up from school, and Spring Break does not fit very well into this plan. Also, Spring Break has apparently introduced a new word into my children’s vocabulary, a word that I happen to despise. I call it the “b-word” because for me it is worse than the original “b-word” (I may change my mind on that if my children start using the original one, though).
The “b-word” to which I am referring is the word “bored.” An example of it’s use is in the following exchange:
“I’m BORED, Mommy!” Continue reading
Tonight I found myself alone at home, after my two kids miraculously fell asleep without incident, and my husband went out for the evening with some friends. And because I do not usually have evenings to myself, I figured out some ideas of what to do and will share these ideas now, for your benefit, just in case you also manage to have an evening to yourself in the not-too-distant future. Disclaimer: In order for these to work properly, make sure you have a full glass of wine and are properly pyjama-ed before beginning any of these activities. Continue reading
Three more sleeps. That’s how long I have to wait until my husband and I leave for a week-long, kid-free vacation. Seven nights with just the two of us, while his parents stay at our house and look after our children. I keep thinking about that moment when I arrive at my gate at the airport, and I have made it through security and checked my luggage and found my gate … and then I’m done. I will pull my book out of my bag, and I will start to relax. I can’t wait.
But because I am a normal human mother, I of course feel a bit guilty. Continue reading
My husband’s parents are coming to look after my children for a week while I go on a much-needed, super exciting, delightfully relaxing vacation with my husband. I’m very confident in my in-laws’ abilities to care for my kids, and I know that my kids love their Oma and Opa, so I won’t really be too worried about my kids while I’m gone. However, over the last few weeks as I’ve been mentally preparing for this trip, I keep noticing things my younger children say and do that would be completely confusing to someone who isn’t with them all day long. Because toddlers make no sense. So this post can act as a translation guide for my in-laws. Thanks so much, you two! And … ummm … good luck? Continue reading
I was scrolling through my Facebook feed the other day, as one does, when I came upon a sponsored article with this title: “The best-dressed moms on the red carpet!” and then later, this one: “Hot moms who rocked the red carpet!” The title photo for the first article featured the stunning Olivia Wilde (who apparently delivered a baby recently, but unless I see some kind of DNA proof there is no way I will ever believe that). You see, Facebook likes to show me sponsored stuff that it thinks I will find interesting or relatable, which seems to be anything mom-related, or recipe-related (joke’s on you, Facebook! I don’t make recipes!), or ads for that Jamie-Lee Curtis yogurt that helps you have better poops. But when I saw that article it became clear that Facebook does not really know me very well after all. Because, you see, I don’t like when women are sorted into categories from whence to be evaluated physically — specifically, the categories of mom and non-mom. Continue reading
Here are five things that happened at the McDonald’s playplace that we will never, ever mention again. After this public blog post, of course.
1. That time that my toddler insisted she wanted to go into the playplace with her brother, but kept getting stuck in different parts of it and needed me, with my large, awkward, adult body, to climb in after her. More than once. That wasn’t enjoyable.
2. That time my kid peed in the playplace, Continue reading